Flowing moments/What did he just say to me!

Our Father's day had interesting happenings. We had my husbands family in Sat. night and it was so good. We headed to church to sit with my Memaw since it would probably be a tough day. It was. However, the whole song service was on God's faithfulness....how loving and encouraging!

So, afterwards I said goodbye to all except my kids and we headed to the airport to pick up my parents from mission trip to Brazil. My husband was going to head to the resteraunt to save us seats. I got there all excited. No plane...delays...hmmm, what to do. I quickly feed the troops some junk food that they split (being the airport food is a rip-off!) . After I realize that we are going to be here a while I decide to take them outside. There is some hills of grass that they want to play on. As I sit in the car (in front of them) I watch as they run and play. I had let them take off shoes and socks so they were barefoot and looking like a movie moment. I watched as my daughter danced and twirled and ran. Brother chased after her. He then used a hand that pointed at sister, she acted like she was choking.....she brought out shield and sword and fought back he acted like he was choking.....ahhhhh, star wars moments.

We eventually headed back inside to explore and play. As we heard the plane had finally landed (almost 1 1/2 hour late), we headed over to the escalater to watch for Meme and Poppa. I caught eyes with a man and his wife. They said "Ohhh Hi!! How are you doing? What are you doing here?" Trying to think how I knew them, "Hiii, doing good, here to pick up my parents." Bit of confused look from them. Found out they were from our church we had been at here. We chatted as I shortly brought them up to date. THEN, the man says to me out of the blue, "So, now this means you'll be able to get out there and get a real job to...help make a living"

My thoughts...."WHAT? did he just say to me?!!!" From the bottom of my feet to my head feel the blood boiling, heart begins to pound really hard and almost anger sets in. I smile and say "I do have a job (point to kids), Two little jobs right over there that keep me pretty busy!" The wife possibly picking up that I might slug her hubby or wanting to slug him herself steps in and sweetly says "Sure you do, that is a big job."

I got to thinking:

1. It is not good to blab your judgment on others. (especially when you don't even really know them!)

2. What other job is More important that investing in the lives and future of my own kids?!! Nope, nothing else in my noggin!

3. Do I forgive him? Of course I do, I make many mistakes and word mishaps myself.

4. I will close with a couple of verses.

Deu 6:7 And thou shalt teach them diligently unto thy children, and shalt talk of them when thou sittest in thine house, and when thou walkest by the way, and when thou liest down, and when thou risest up.

3Jo 1:4

I have no greater joy than to hear that my children walk in truth.

Faithbooking!

I have had some people ask me about faithbooking so I decided to write a post about it.
I went to a party one time for scrapbooking but it was called Faithbooking. I will try to describe it and then give an example. She chose pictures of times in her life where God did something with her Faith...to grow it...kindof like a picture book of her faith journey. The pictures may not even have always had her in them but it was something or someone who led her further. The story was so beautiful and brought us to tears. It is not as decorated as a scrapbook (however you could do that if you wanted to) and has more journaling beside pictures. One thing I loved is how she spoke about history was past down with writing and pictures. What an awesome thing to leave to our kids....our faith journey...or their own faith journey to look back on. It is just such a wonderful idea.

I am going to try to link a picture so you can see the pic and see my journal as an example. http://www.flickr.com/photos/10996764@N00/120578496/

The kids had been avidly praying for a dog. Dad had even kindof wanted one. Mom said NO. One day we were at soccer games until late in the afternoon. When we got home there had been a message left early that morning that a dog was chained to a handicap parking pole in our church parking lot. They wondered if my hubby could do something about it. He was a minister on staff. He told me he thought it had probably already been taken care of but he wanted to go see about the dog since it had been a really hot day. He took off. Shortly, he came home and opened up the back of the car. Out came the cutest dog (a lab beagle mix). My kids were estatic. They asked if we could keep it but Dad said we needed to see if we could find it's owner. The dog had been well cared for and was well trained. He slept on a bed we made him that night and didn't get up once. He was quiet, loved to snuggle and play with kids, didn't bark much, obeyed most all orders. After days of not finding the owner, the kids were saying "God gave us a dog!!" I had to admit that if I Had to have a dog this one met my standards of already being well trained and not loud and irritating. God met the whole family's desires and answered my kids prayers!

Back!!

We are finally hooked up again and I'm so excited. It is amazing how you miss some of the connections while being off. However, we have been so busy with unpacking, job searching, family visiting that we have had little extra time. Thank you so much for your prayers during this time.

God's provision again! My hubby has found a job! Yeah!! It is not in ministry but rather management. It looks like it will be something he will enjoy and an income we can live on. It will definitely be an adjustment but we are excited about it. We have prayed and wrestled about full time vocational ministry but at this point we believe we are not to be full time. We love ministry and will continue to do it as it is our first calling. However, it will just look different than what we have done in the past. Thank you for continuing to pray for our future.

We are enjoying being back at home and close to family. It has rained for several days and we have LOVED it!! We came from desert so the refreshing rain and cooler weather feels terrific! We also love the rolling hills and greenery!! Nothing like home. :) I firmly believe that your prayers have helped us in this very chaotic and emotional time. I cannot thank you enough for all the loving support. I am anxious to get done unpacking so that I can have more time to read your blogs and catch up on your lives!

God's Provision!

"God is faithful even when we are faithless" (part of a verse in the Bible that has ministered to me....at the moment can't remember the reference will have to fill in later)

I want to thank so many of you for your sweet encouraging words. Michelle, thank you for your blog and continued encouragement to us! My family and friends have done so much...they have given money, hosted us in their homes, helped us move, brought us food and certificates etc. I believe all of that is God's provisions.

Also, we had an amazing moment when we were getting down to nitty gritty and bills were rolling in, a man who had been at our last church somehow heard about us coming back and our situation. We really don't know how he knew because we hadn't told to many people in this area yet. However, God allowed him to know and impressed him to give to us. He wrote us a check for $5000.00!!! I cannot keep quiet about it because all of you are praying and I must give testimony to God providing!! WE are thrilled and thanking God! I had peace that God would provide, He has done it before but he also allows us to struggle at times for learning reasons. Needless to say, I was overjoyed when the money was revealed. Relief and less stress for this month. Thank you God!!

So, thank you for your continued prayer support. I am only briefly at a computer. We will not have internet until around Tues. I miss getting to chat. Hope you are all doing well! Thanks for your love. It has brought me to tears!

Thank you sweet friends!

How can I thank you enough for your sweet kind words and love. It was very comforting to me and I cried as I read your sweet comments and heard sweet words of love and encouragement. I cannot share with you how much sweet friends like you are so important. God even allowed Michelle to call me right when I was breaking down and really wanted to talk to family but couldn't. Her sweet words had me bursting in tears and she was crying with me and encouraging me...Thank you for that Michelle. (this ones for the girls)

God sustained us as we headed home on a 16 hour trip. It was broken up. One of the hard parts was that a very violent stomach virus was spreading among the family who had been around Papaw the last few days. My Mom and Dad and Uncle Ken and cousin and my sister (literaturelover) were such troopers caring for everyone. They worked so hard and I was so wishing I was there to help. It was hard being away. When we finally got there I really couldn't be around them much because of the threat of sickness and our impending move. God so helped sis and me to sing for my Papaw's funeral and our husbands speak. They did an amazing job. Memaw was well enough to attend even though she was very weak. It was such a sweet service and a tribute to this precious man we love.

I am in the middle of finishing packing as well as having some time with a friend at the beach. (bttrfly1976). She has treated us to join her at the condo and it has been so nice to listen to the waves and know the vastness of God while also having such waves of peace and sadness. We are gearing up for more goodbyes this Sunday. Our church is having a going away reception for us. It is so sweet but hard too, goodbyes are never easy.

My husband's part in the speaking was about how every exit is an entrance. It is so true. Thank you again sweet friends for your kindness. Much love and hugs.

Sadness

Today is a sad day for our family. One of our favorite people made his way from this life to our real home. It was our Papaw. We love him so much that it hurts and at the same time we are happy for him to have relief. He was so many things to us. He was a support, encouragement, laughter, loving, kind, loyal. I would love to give a royal tribute to him but it may come later. Today I am dealing with goodbye. And my encouragement is thinking of his face to face hello.

Incredible

I have to share something so incredible with you.
My friend www.intothedepths-bttrfly1976.blogspot.com
did all the work to find this video and it was SO touching to me. I wrote a few blogs back about wanting prayers for new decisions. I just want to say thank you for your prayers. A new decision in our family has been made. I don't have time to write all about it but we are moving back to our previous home. We have peace about this decision and many factors in the reasons. We do not have things figured out for future but we are living on faith in our Father who is more than faithful. We would appreciate continued prayer support and I would love to encourage you by having you double click on the song above....beautiful message.

Happy Birthday Dad!!!

Today is the birthday of one of my greatest Heros! He is the man who worked two jobs to make ends meet so that my Mom could stay home with us. He is the man whose family WAS His hobby and we knew it. He is the one who was always there filming pretty much anything we did and promoting us to others like a promotion manager would do. He is not about being in the lime light and is a very behind the stage personality. He is a major Server and serves the Lord with a joyful spirit!! He is always sporting a big grin and His face just naturally looks loving and caring. He is a man so many others respect. He is consiencious (sp?) and detailed with financing and overseeing the affairs of the home. He is wise. He is a follower of Christ, not just in words but in deeds. He shines the love of God to anyone he meets. He is friendly and a hugger. He is also a teaser! He loves to jump out and scare or to do pranks. He also receives this back with laughter and fun. He has helped laughter always be in our family. He has shown courage, faith, love, hope, and peace throughout His life!

Dad, there is no way to adequately describe you. I do want to say that I am forever grateful that on this day many years ago :) you were born and have blessed and enriched our lives forever!!

I love you!!

No Ease

I have read some heart hard blogs as well as heard from people whose heart was heavy loaded. I too have had those times lately. It made me think about my life. So many good as well as painful moments. I want the good ones to last and for things to be ease for me, my family, friends. Even when I feel I am in a pocket of ease someone I love or care about may not be. I think I have hoped that there is that place where I will glide and be at peace not wrestling.

In ministry I have seen situations where people are totally obedient and yet things get hard and bad. Then there are others who seem to glide on to what we see as glory. I get distracted and off base by that. I want that. I'm realizing that is not my promise from Him. He doesn't want me distracted by the worlds view or even good people's view. He even tells me that I will have persecution. He promises He will be with me. He doesn't say life is about happy but rather joyful in Him. To accomplish the ultimate purpose.

Our time on earth is not about ease. I have had the priveledge of those short moments, but all in all it is about sacrifice, challenge, taking up the cross and following after regardless. This does not mean hopeless but how much more content and free would I be if I really expected trials instead of working to not have any. The real ease is life with HIM as well as our future home with Him in heaven. It makes me more hungry for Him and for my true home. It makes me realize that maybe that is the point, and Maybe the ultimate lie of the enemy is to get God's people striving for the wrong thing....ease.

Does Somebody Need a Hug? / Greetings!

A few weeks ago my Mom and I were talking about greeting others. I had written a little article about it and was sharing with her. She then told me a story that was so cute. She talked about a lady in the office who refused to be ignored or not greeted. She would speak to everyone and if they didn't even acknowledge her she would say something to the effect of "Does Somebody Need a Hug!!" and get up and hug them.

I totally laughed at this because I, myself, am a big hugger. I know the feeling of giving someone a hug who might not want it. After a period of time, she trained others to know that if they didn't speak or greet, then she would help cheer them by giving them a hug. Many people who do not speak are task people so they are not necessarily wanting hugs either. Turns out, they were able to find it within to begin speaking to her. They also became more pleasent. Isn't it amazing what just one person can do to change attitudes or environment.


How to Greet Someone

1. Look at them and speak! Have you ever walked in a room and people look at you but no one said a word to you? It is a bad feeling. On the flip side. Have you ever walked into a room and were greeted with a warm hello? It feels like a fresh drink of water.
2. Raise eyebrows and smile. I remember being in a seminar with Gary Smalley and John Trent and they talked about honoring someone. They raised their eyebrows and opened their mouths with a gasp. We all laughed but you know what, who wouldn’t want that greeting. It is as if a great leader or movie star walked into the room and you can hear the gasping and excitement. THAT is how we should greet others! With enthusiasm and excitement!
3. Words of warmth and excitement. Suzie, I’m So happy to see you! Julie, I am so glad you could make it! John, great to see you here! Hi! Hey there! What’s up?!! Hello! Welcome! Do you notice what kind of punctuation is being used on all those welcomes? Exclamation marks!! That is how we should be with anyone we greet!
4. How hard is a greeting really? NOT HARD. I actually think it takes more effort NOT to smile or speak than it does to just do it. When you greet you share a warmth with others. It is like passing a fragrant flower rather than a mildewed dishtowel.

So Go for it! The next person you see…Greet!

Head Spinning!

Have you ever had times when your head is spinning out of control?! My husband and I have a lot of decisions that we are in the midst of making. It is talking and talking and thinking and thinking and praying, praying...you get the point. I want to focus on other things but find myself consumed. I know that He wants me to "cast my cares upon Him" and "be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication let my request be made known to Him" and I am trying to do all that but still find it consuming me. I prefer to know everything that is suppose to happen RIGHT NOW!! That is not how it all works out though. I guess it is part of His plan to Grow me. But I don't have to enjoy it do I? Oh yea, rejoice in everything....hmmm. I do find though that when I do go to Him and get His peace I am able to rejoice in who He is but it is just getting to that point. I would really covet your prayers for our family and decisions being looked at and made at this time.

Top Five New Abbreviations!!

Drum Roll Please!! Here are the Top Five New Abbreviations for this blog:

cs-curtesy laugh
lhcb-laughing hard, can't breath
br-bathroom run
dul-deliriously uncontrollable laughter
idhtttuga -I don't have time to think up goofy abbreviations

Thanks to all who participate and won in my goofy abbreviation contest!!! :)
(see previous blog for credit to winners!)

lol,rofl, What are your thoughts?

I was talking to my friend the other night about the abreviations we see all the time. I told her I thought it was time for some new ones. So, here are my thoughts for laughter suggestions.

sl=snorty laughter
ll=little laugh
al=almost laugh
sh=stomach hurt
bl=blast laugher
ng=nutty grin

I know that I am Not the most creative person so would you guy help me out? Just think, we could start a whole new trend just by using our own abbreviations. I would love to see your ideas and then we will give it a drum roll and a top ten!!! You could be on a top ten list!!!
(can you tell I need some sleep?)

Remembering Amber and Aunt Helen

This weekend last year was a sad one for us. My cousin's daughter, Amber, was killed by a drunk driver. She had graduated high school but had her life to look forward to. It has been a year of many tough moments and more to come. Grief doesn't just go after one moment...such a process. I have communicated with her Mom throughout this year and have been amazed at how God has brought her through such tough sorrow. I can't even come close to understanding fully. I am still praying for their family. The main comfort is knowing that she was a follower of Christ and can enjoy her wonderful Lord and Savior.

My Great Aunt Helen passed away last Sunday. She lived a long life. She was gracious and a complete lady. A teacher and had a passion to teach others. We will miss her but appreciate her legacy.

We never know the hour when our time will come to leave this earth. I am so glad there is hope and that hope is Christ Jesus!

Big Angry Eyes

Today we were eating lunch and hubby hopped home to eat with us. He was stating that he did not think the rice was done enough. I disagreed. The kids chimmed in with him. I turned back to something I was doing while feeling a bit irritated (ie, "Be grateful for what you get already!"). My daughter saw me and exclaimed "Oh no, now Mommy's really mad at us, she has those big eyes that are angry!" I couldn't help it, it was So funny that I burst out laughing hysterically along with son and hubby. It evolved into much snorty laughter. Ohhh, why must they noticed so well when I am having a bad attitude. Well, at least the big angry eyes turned into squinty happy eyes.

My son on the other hand came to me a few minutes ago and said "Mommy, did you know that your my Mommy but also my sister?" (honey, I know we are originally from Arkansas but that doesn't mean...) I said, "Really?" He said, "Yes, you're my sister in Christ!" HOW CUTE!!! Whewl sure I am!!

More Info.

I got tagged by my sweet friend visiongirl to do a more informational tag.

The 4 Things Meme

4 Jobs:
1) Counselor
2) Kelly, Hart, Hallman law firm Receptionist
3) J.B. Hunt telecommunications
4) McDonald's cashier

4 Movies I Could Watch Over and Over:
1) Pride and Prejudice
2) Anne of Green Gables
3) Narnia
4) Lord of the Rings

4 Websites I Visit Regularly:
1) blogs of friends or fellow women I enjoy
2) Ways to Market yourself/Stay at home opportunities
3) e-bay
4) news

4 Favorite Foods:
1) chips and salsa
2) cheese enchiladas, refried beans and rice
3) fettecini chicken and pasta
4) brownies (my favorites are so healthy! L)

4 Places I Would Rather Be Right Now: Really I am quite content being just where I am but if I had to choose another place...
1) at my sister's house with our kids playing and she and I talking and planning.
2) playing at the beach with my three sweeties, hubby and kids!
3) visiting my parents/grands
4) with a group of women I love in a bible study/share/prayer time

4 Books I Could Read Over and Over:
1) the Bible
2) Cindy Rushton's Homeschooling the Easy Way and Marilyn Howshall's Wisdom's Way of Learning, basically any homeschooling books that I like
3) home organization books....love to study this!
4) home decorating books....love to study this too!

4 Songs I Could Listen to Over and Over: this is a tough one, I love so many and it changes from time to time.
1) Selah - Anything they sing
2) All I want for Christmas...such pep. tune
3) Natalie Grant - most of her stuff but love song "Held" and "Believe"
4) Josh Groben and Charlotte church "The Prayer"

4 Reasons Why I Keep a Blog:
1) Love having input/output from home at times I have available
2) Explore others thoughts and write more
3) I've only lived in area 6 months and have gotten to know some people deeply but still....feel lonely for true, Godly friends
4)journal happenings with my kids/family

4 Places I’ve Lived: (this could be a long one...will only list 4)
1) Columbia, SC
2) Athens, TN
3) Fort Worth, TX
4) Bella Vista AR

4 TV Shows I Love:
1) What not to wear
2) SuperNanny
3) Divine Design with Candice Olsen
4) American Idol (only I only have seen a few of these this season.)

4 Places I’ve Vacationed
1)Branson, MO
2)Pigeon Forge, SC
3)South Padre Island, TX
4)Camping in MO

Whew, if any lasted with me through all those answers consider yourself tagged!!:) It is fun to think about.

Questions!!

Okay, I have always thought it might be fun to be a "Dear Abby" columnist or talk personality. So, wanna make my dreams reality? Sure ya do! L

Think of a good question, maybe one you have or someone else has had and submit it in my comments. If you don't want people to know it is you, feel free to submit anonymously.

These can be silly or serious questions (just not lude or inappropriate for this blog)

I think I'll make up a name for myself...you can give ideas on that as well! I've always loved the name Victoria, so for now, you can call me

Dear Tori!

Tag, I'm it!!

TAG! I'm it! I've been tagged! :) I'm so excited! I enjoy a good blog-game. I've been tagged by www.prayingforaprodigal.blogspot.com. I must list six random things about myself, and then tag six more people. They have instructed me to "First post your six things, then you go to six other blogs and let them know they are tagged and to find the details on your blog." Not one that likes to disappoint, here goes!

1. I got to sing with a 300 person choir behind me backing me up....talk about cool backup.

2. I have an amazing twin sister who I LOVE....http://www.memoirsofaministerswife.blogspot.com aka Literature Lover. I also have a brother who I LOVE who is 6 years younger than us almost to the day...born the day after us.

3. I LOVE my new virtual friends and blogging!

4. I am a Major "Hugger".

5. I have a Masters in Marriage and Family Counseling and Religious Education.

6. I am Crazy about my hubby and kids!!

Since my link is still not working I am going to share the names but it won't link to them. Since I am only allowed six I will let you guys tag the others. :) I tag Literature Lover, Butterfly1976, JulieBohemian, JoyfulJourney, ThisOne'sForThe Girls, Sarah. Enjoy!

Hmm

This morning my son asked me to look something up for him on the computer. I did. While I was doing it sister asked why I liked the computer so much. Then, brother said "If you had to pick between us and the computer which would you pick?" Okay, computer going off.

(btw, when I looked at him and asked, what do you think I would pick? at least he laughed and said "us". )

Stepping away slowly...slowly...

Modern Day Miracle!!

I am so excited I don't even know how to begin this post! I have a friend (BTW - asked her permission to share this) who has struggled throughout her life with not feeling God cared or loved her. She is a christian but much of her belief system was in deep wounds from early childhood. We have stayed in touch for around 12 years. I have watched her struggle in this and tried to help but the struggle continued. Last night God did a work in her!

I have a background in counseling and I have gone to training on a prayer/counseling ministry called theo-phostic. I cannot begin to explain it in a sentence but I will try, it is really coming to grips with wounds in the past, realizing the lies the enemy has crippled them with (i.e. unworthy, trapped, unloved etc), then asking God to reveal His truth to them. Most people feel they will never be able to get past their past. However, God has other plans. His light shines and His truth sets them free. I never know how He will do it with each person but when He does reveal Himself it is amazing!

We talked and the conversation got more serious. She still questioned God's love and mercy, why He would allow such pain and then not be there for her.

I felt Him prompting me to encourage her to bring it to Him. She did. Silence. She felt so much fear, sadness, frustration, betrayal that He wouldn't respond. He led me to encourage her to wait on Him. She did. He brought to her mind a past painful memory. She was letting her pain out. God revealed where He was in that moment.

Picking her up and holding her, rocking her, with her, letting her rest on Him, wiping her tears.

She said to me "I can't believe He was there! He is holding me, all I ever wanted was for him to hold me." God knew exactly what she needed, I had no idea what she really needed....but He did. She didn't want to leave that moment. His presence was evident and the new picture in her mind was beauty for ashes.

I am not about emotionalism but I am of the mind that God still does miracles in our modern day and I am so happy to have been part of one!! My friend re-visited her earlier negative beliefs...they were gone. Her new fellowship with Him was so sweet. The truth He gave her in that memory had set her free! I think because I had been with her through some of these tough struggles it was extra sweet!

Thank you, Lord of all! for touching and healing my beloved friend!

Did I Judge her?

Over the weekend we had various committments and fun gatherings. When I was at one of these gatherings a discussion came up about a relationship between one of the ladies daughter and a guy(not growing christian) that she was going to prom with. She was telling how she felt she should show love to him with the love of Christ. I was sitting next to a another lady who is very good to voice her opinion and stated her stance "Well, I could love the guy with the love of Christ but not allow him to date my daughter." I really agreed with that statement and although I said nothing the first lady seemed to want to justify all the more...as if trying to convince me she was right.

Later we left to go to another party.

Today I got a call from the lady with the daughter. She was wounded. After I had left the previous day, more discussion ensued about Easter Egg Hunts and those who agreed with it and those who did not. Other things had also been discussed like teenagers dress code and parents lack of following through.

Okay, enough of all the details. Anyway, I am on the phone with this lady who feels hurt and judged. I Listened. I empathized. I realized. She felt judged....and I think I had judged.

There are many times that I feel passionate about something and really want someone to see the truth and see my point of view...especially if I have more experience or if I just feel I'm right and they would benefit from my knowledge. L You know, mentorship.

I do think mentorship is invaluable and we all need to be humble enough to accept it including me. However, is there a difference between mentoring and judging.

My friend said something that hit me hard....she said "I mean, God did give me my children to raise so why do other people have to judge me for it!" I like that statement when it comes to my kids but not so much when it comes to kids whose parents don't seem to care if they are being considerate of other people or not! However, if I think negatively for them am I judging? Am I being honest? What?!

I felt in this instance that I had to admit I had judged. I have not walked in her shoes with her kids and she has kids that are older so I should respect her decision even if I don't agree with it.

So, it is a hard one to resolve. I mainly listened on the phone and encouraged. You know, we mothers already feel like failures in our job a LOT of the time and I think the enemy capitalizes on that. So, I am realizing that I really need to walk a far extra mile to ensure that I love and not judge.

I felt for her today, my friend, and I wished I had not judged.

The Tomb Is Empty! HE IS RISEN!!!!

Mat 28:1 Now after the Sabbath, as it began to dawn toward the first {day} of the week, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary came to look at the grave.
Mat 28:2 And behold, a severe earthquake had occurred, for an angel of the Lord descended from heaven and came and rolled away the stone and sat upon it.
Mat 28:3 And his appearance was like lightning, and his clothing as white as snow.
Mat 28:4 The guards shook for fear of him and became like dead men.
Mat 28:5 The angel said to the women, "Do not be afraid; for I know that you are looking for Jesus who has been crucified.
Mat 28:6 "He is not here, for He has risen, just as He said. Come, see the place where He was lying.
Mat 28:7 "Go quickly and tell His disciples that He has risen from the dead; and behold, He is going ahead of you into Galilee, there you will see Him; behold, I have told you."
Mat 28:8 And they left the tomb quickly with fear and great joy and ran to report it to His disciples.


I love it!! "...with fear and great joy and ran to report it..." Wanting to do the same!! Praise Him!!

The Day He Died

Mat 27:45 Now from the sixth hour darkness fell upon all the land until the ninth hour.
Mat 27:46 About the ninth hour Jesus cried out with a loud voice, saying, "ELI, ELI, LAMA SABACHTHANI?" that is, "MY GOD, MY GOD, WHY HAVE YOU FORSAKEN ME?"
Mat 27:47 And some of those who were standing there, when they heard it, {began} saying, "This man is calling for Elijah."
Mat 27:48 Immediately one of them ran, and taking a sponge, he filled it with sour wine and put it on a reed, and gave Him a drink.
Mat 27:49 But the rest {of them} said, "Let us see whether Elijah will come to save Him."
Mat 27:50 And Jesus cried out again with a loud voice, and yielded up His spirit.
Mat 27:51 And behold, the veil of the temple was torn in two from top to bottom; and the earth shook and the rocks were split.

Friends

Thank you all for the sweet comments and prayers. I feel God is really showing me that I need to trust him and let my offenses go...forgiving. Anyway, one thing I am completely thankful for in life is friends! I think God gave them as such encouragement! When we moved I really missed my friends and still do, but I am making new ones and as silly as this may sound...I love blogworld!!! and my friends here as well!!! :)

I was reading from another Mom whose son has left for a job far away. It made me cry but also was SOOO sweet you will have to check it out.(http://www.prayingforaprodigal.blogspot.com ) BTW, I try to link, you know where you hit the link button and then are able to put a word and link the address, but it isn't working. Is anyone else having this problem? Let me know if you have a solution!

Hope you are having a great day!

Hard Day

Sunday we had the vote for the worship leader. It did not go well. The vote was split and the "no's" got it. We were floored. My husband was hurt. He is the pastor and it felt like a slap in the face to his direction. This has not been the case with other things but I think with music people get really touchy. Needless to say, I, as the fill in "volunteer worship leader" was Very disappointed. I thought if I could just make it until they came all would be fine. Now, I am debating giving my 2 weeks notice and letting them find someone else.

My sweet hubby did an amazing job relaying the message to the sweet couple but there is no good way to give that kind of news. They are young but were so gracious...it was tough. Please pray for my husband as he was hit hard by this and wrestling with other thoughts. Pray for me as I want to support him and not take up an offense (although at this point offense is taken). Sometimes in ministry and dealing with this sort of thing you want to just throw in the towell and go live like everyday people, getting to minister how you choose without people's expectations. However, I know spiritual warfare happens and that is more what this is about. I know we have the victory. Sorry this is a downer e-mail but thanks for your prayers.

Victory!

I am loving this song! Especially right here at Easter time...whoo! Sing it Yolanda~

Spiral Staircase/Along Side Us

I was reading another blog from kindredspiritmom and she was addressing a journey on spiral staircase. I felt like she did, that sometimes I am going in circles on my journey...like a merry-go-round. Costantly learning and re-learning the same things wondering if I am ever going to get it. However, her analogy to a spiral staircase was so much more encouraging...going in circles but continually going up a little further.

Today was one of the days I felt God showed me we are climbing a little. Let me start by saying, I have loved Marilyn Howshall's writings for some time. I posted an article about some of her stuff. Anyway, she talks about kids coming along side you and learning what you are learning in your personal walk.

Today my dd was drawing some oranges. She didn't think she did very well. She is 6 and I looked and was amazed! Her oranges had little indentions at the top and really looked great! I admired and encouraged and asked her how she knew how to draw the top of the orange...she sheepishly looked at me and said...."From an artist." I said, "Really? What artist?" She said, "You Mommy!" Then I remembered that a few days earlier I had been sketching some fruit (inspired by sister and carrielouise) and had been practicing on that very thing...along side us.

Then, my son was talking about death and my daughter said, "But Noah, no one has to be scared of death because you would be with your Daddy!" (her arms lifted up to him) I loved it because a few days ago we had been talking of God being Abba, our Daddy. They loved that and she remembered it...Thank you Lord. ...along side us..

I was trying to delve into more scripture and even memorize portions so I was taping myself and listening. My son loved what I had done and wanted to copy me...delving in word...memorization....meditation....along side us.

I am so thankful to my Heavenly Daddy that he takes us along side Him so we can take them along side us.

A Case of the Giggles

The other night my son and I were in the middle of a project that we had been working on for a while. Right at the end for no apparent reason my son got a case of the giggles. He could not stop. Not the irritating trying to be funny kind but the real giggles. He would try to get a grip but then would burst again. I began to get tickled just because of him. We would try to re-focus because we both wanted to accomplish what we had begun but there was no getting it done. The giggles invaded.

Do you remember times like this?

It reminded me of times in my past where something hit me funny and I could not contain the giggles. They like to invade at the most inappropriate times (like when someone falls and is sprawled out on the floor) but when they hit there is no stopping them....oh, you can try but you can't hide....in just a minute....here they come again. You can almost feel it a coming from the depths of your belly and there it is....hahahahaha....

No one can tell me that our God doesn't have a sense of humor.

Laughable

I have been reading up on servanthood, including wonderful ways to serve hubby and make him feel cherished and treasured. Anyway, I clean up dinner and he has just come in from a meeting. I offer ice cream to the kids and to him. He takes the offer and enjoys. I stop and take time to visit with him. I go back to finish in kitchen and ask him if he would like some tea to drink. He pauses, says he already has water. Then, I think he is talking to the kids, he says "What's wrong?" He asks again and I realize he is talking to me. I say "Nothing." He says "Do you have some bad news you need to tell me." "No" "What is it then?" I start laughing at this point. I go over and sit in his lap and snuggle him and say "No, I just realized that I need to be letting my very best friend know that he is that special. I just love you." He just looks at me then acts like he is trying to see if I have the Mission Impossible mask on. We both get tickled. I know he likes to jest with me but it hits me that I am not doing near enough cherishing...you know,the little things. I get focused on my agendas or family stuff or kids etc. So, if I was wondering about needing that lesson on servanthood, I think God gave me the message LOUD and clear!

Too Funny!

Okay, this is too funny. This homeschool mom came up with a t-shirt that is hysterical. Tell me what you think and if you would be brave enough to wear it.

http://homeschoolblogger.com/creativehomeschooling/20348

Pearl Gate

I have prayed for a hunger for God's word. I love His word and want to read it, but when I read David talking over and over about how much He LOVES God's words and when I hear Beth Moore talking about how she can't live a day without them I have to re-think my love of them. I definitely feel that there are seasons I feel this way but not a daily consistent longing. Well, I feel God has used some new outlets to begin this longing in me.

It started while reading "A Woman After God's Own Heart"as well as the"Cornerstones" book for girls. In the Cornerstone book it talked about preparing our girls to have work at home so they wouldn't have to work outside the home even if they never married. I thought this was so neat since I have needed to do this from time to time. She gave great thoughts on how to use natural skills and talents and it got me to thinking about what were mine. This started an idea in my head. Then, when reading the other book it talked about imparting God's wisdom to our children all throughout the day. I have read those verses and that has always been a goal but I felt lacking. Anyway, what started as one venture turned into a different venture and it has set my mind a churning. It was contagious because my kids wanted in on what I was doing. I found I was consumed with a passage and trying to memorize it. The more I thought and dwelt the more I wanted to read it again. The more I tried to memorize the more I took home. So, was this the meditating He was talking about? The part I memorized was life in me. Then, in S.S. we were in Revelation. There were parts that related to the part of scripture I had been meditating on. And chewing on throughout the day, and re-visiting, and learning, searching, loving.

Anyway, I was in S.S. and the lesson was on ch.21. I was amazed by some facts I have missed in the past. I always heard the pearly gates but this is neat:

"1Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth, for the first heaven and first earth had passed away, and the sea existed no longer....16bHe measured the city with a rod at 12,000 stadia...19a the foundation of the city wall were adorned with every kind of precious stone....

21 THE TWELVE GATES ARE 12 PEARLS! each individual gate was made of a single pearl. The broad street of the city was pure gold, like transparent glass."

Can you imagine walls as long as 1500 miles and a gate, a single pearl big enough to be the gate. It goes on to say,

"25 Each day its gates will never close because it will never be night there."

Anyway, that afternoon I told my son I had some neat stuff from the Bible but I would tell him a little later. Later he begged me to share what I was talking about. I did and it turned into big discussion and Bible focus. I love those God moments that I already have with my kids but I realized I need to be more intentional about it and help them also be excited about the living truth! I found it really is contagious. When I was excited and focused there so were they. Hmmm, sometimes things I make hard really should be easy. In fact, Jesus addresses that, my yoke easy and burden light.

Wave Therapy

Ocean, originally uploaded by Martina.

(don't know the people in the picture but this is what our beach looks like)
Yesterday was our family day and we took off for some much need wave therapy(As my husband likes to call it...truly it is theraputic). We drove over to the beach! It was so fun to pack a lunch and head there. The water was still very cold to me but that didn't stop my kids. Off they went to swim, splash,make sand castles and play spy games on the sand dunes. Meanwhile, hubby and I sat with the waves crashing, wind gently blowing and sea gulls gawking, reading our books. Mine was "A Woman after God's own Heart"(very good and convicting in a good way....probably another blog) and husbands was a Calvin and Hobbs book. We had fun reading and talking, looking at seashells and just relaxing. Ahhhhhhhhh. Refreshing.

Jesus, take the wheel by Carrie Underwood

I'm not much into country music but this song is good. The title pretty much says it all.

Beating Up

I have found in my thoughts lately that I worry too much and beat myself up. Whether it is not doing enough in my parenting or schooling or housework or ministry. It can be overwhelming. I feel that I genuinely try but so many times feel the failure. I will let my thoughts get to me before I even realize it. Taking thoughts captive can be a challenge. I've realized that self talk or enemy talk can be upon me so fast and have me down before I even know it. I don't feel that I live my life with a lot of regrets but I think that is the thing I fear the most....regretting. I don't want to regret how I raised my children or treated my husband or how my kids turn out or the ministry I am involved in. I want to see fruit like I feel I should see it. I want so bad for my kids to be passionate about the Lord but I have seen other faithful parents whose children didn't choose that road. I have fears. I am not in control. Nor do I really want to be but it seems that sometimes I wish I were. It seems that my actions look like I have the illusion of having some semblance of control. It is almost a relief for me to realized I don't and that He does. It is also a thing I fear. I know He loves me and realizes all I can handle but I wrestle there. I wish I didn't. I don't want to feel beat up daily. I am praying that He will help me with this battle of the mind and choosing to see the good He has done in me and allow Him to deal with the struggles and future. I need to rest there. I hope I will. But, really, the point I have to come to is that it is not about me and my wants, rather His purpose. His purpose scares me, I can't be perfect in it and I feel that means failure. But He knew that didn't He? It is more of a process of trusting....which I also have issues with. Wow, still so much growing to do. Growth, that is a process I can relate to.

Menu Plans

I was inspired to write out my plans due to my sister(LL) and friend(TOFTG). I wanted to link to their sites but my link button is acting up. Plus, it just helps me when I get it on paper or blog...:)

Monday
L-Mac & Cheese, fruit salad
S- Bacon Wrapped Pork Tenderloin
Cheesy Potatoes
Carrots and Peas
Fruit Salad

Tues.
L- Grilled turkey & cheese
S- Homemade Vegetable Beef Soup
fruit

Wed.
L-Hot Pocket sandwich
S-Creamy Chicken with Pasta, veggies, bread and butter

Thurs.
L-PBJ
S-Chicken fajitas or enchildas
Refried beans and rice

Friday
L-Meat, Cheese and Fruit Kabobs (copied from my sister)
S-Meatloaf
Mashed Potatoes
Green beans

Sat.
L-chicken nuggets, chips,
carrots and broccli, fruit
S - Pizza at the church

Sun.
L-Out to Eat
S-Cereal

Riveting Hero

I had the real privledge of reading the beginning of a book from a Viet Nam vet with a purple heart. I couldn't put it down. It was riveting!! The Viet Nam vet just happens to be my Dad. I was amazed at all that my Dad faced. I have to share a short paragraph about one moment when he and the other marines were squatting down waiting to move because they knew the enemy was close around them. It is not even the most suspenseful part but one I didn't know which gave me even more insight into what they faced.

"We were spaced out 20 yards or so between each other to not cause any attention while our point Marines were observing the village. We were waiting quietly for what seemed forever in this heat and humidity. As I squatted down near a bush to wait I noticed movement in the monkey grass 30 yards to my side. I noticed this large snake which appeared to be 6 to 8 feet long, not sure what kind but the head was much larger than the body. I was told later that it probably was a Monocellate or King Cobra, they can grow up to 17.5 feet long. He raised his head above the grass and looked around and then seemed to fix his eyes on me and headed my way. I could not fire my weapon without giving away our position so I drew my bayonet and got ready to try and cut him in half before he bit me, as he got close and I got ready he stopped and looked at me and then headed in the opposite direction. What a relief as I took a deep breath and wondered what would have been the outcome. I understand that there are around 140 snake species in Vietnam and 30 of them are poisonous."

I can't wait until my Dad finishes his story. I will be recommending it to everyone. He faced such opposition and has never been one to talk about it unless we asked. He is a man who is unassuming but has such magnificent strength. I think the thing I took away while reading is that He is a hero. He would never agree to that but he is. He got a friend who was freezing up out of fear, to act and move when the enemy was firing at them. If he hadn't they wouldn't have made it through. He also helped another man who was just sitting by his friend grieving and in shock and forced him to move. I am also equally thankful to others who saved his life in the midst of battle. It was so harsh some of what they faced but I am so thankful that my Dad made it home and that He had the Lord to lean on during that time. Dad, thank you for your bravery and heroic measures. You are my hero!

Hair Reformation

While being at my Mom's she tried desperately to help my bleached blond (that I had previously messed up) with very dark one inch roots take a better turn. She pulled my hair through to do some low lights. Well, we pulled a little too much through and it all turned dark. It was like a dark ash gray....hmmm...nice. We decided the next day it must be remedied again so once again I went through the poking my head while she painstakingly pulled it through yet another time. Finally I would look natural. She didn't pull as much hair through and although it is much lighter it is more of a dark blond with a few highlights. Aww well, we tried. I don't want my hair to fall out so we must stop for now but maybe in a month....heehee....Mom is begging me not to touch my hair again. I feel it was a process from ugly egg to trying to get to the swan. Maybe I made it to a wan.

trying to go from eggly to swan

Suprisingly Lengthy Trip

What started out as a trail to visit family has turned rather lengthy. I took my husbands car at the last minute due to hurrying to beat out bad weather that was coming where I was going. I made it in time to be safe. Thank you Lord. However, when I was driving those 70 mile an hour my car was beginning to shake pretty bad so I would slow down. I was worried that a screw was loose around the tired or something. It seemed to do okay without the shakes when I slowed down. It was hard to stay slower because I was in a hurry to end our 14 hour trip but at the same time I didn't want to be on the side of the road either.

When I got to my husband's side of the family they specifically asked if I had car trouble. (God protecting) When I told my Mom in law about my trouble she took me straight to the shop where we found out my tires and alignment were bad. My parents-in-law graciously blessed me with all new tires. THANK YOU!!However, the car place said they couldn't get it aligned because I had a rod that was bent and it needed to go to the dealer to get fixed. So, I decided to do that when I got to my folks. Of course, I stopped at sister's first and enjoyed my time then headed to my parents. I took it to the shop and they had to order a part that wouldn't come in until Tues.

Well, they called me yesterday and had the part(which was going to be very expensive with labor) but couldn't get it to align so they found further problem. Our fiances can only take so many hits. Please pray for our car problems to end and it not be as severe as it is sounding. I couldn't sleep for a while last night thinking but God has given peace and I know He is in charge of all.

I will say that my family has been so wonderful to accomodate and love on me while I keep staying on yet another day. We are having a wonderful time but Really Missing Hubby/Daddy and ready to head back home. I would covet your prayers that the soloution would be brief and good.

Dancing

I have had so much fun family time this week. It has been good. It is hard to feel you want to be in two places but can only reside in one at a time.

While we were at my sister she and I enjoyed listening to music and dancing around while making lunches or cleaning up or just being goofy.

Anytime my kids hear upbeat music their little bodies just get to grooving. I love to watch the process.

My nieces put on a skating show for me that was just to die for!! They got costumes that really made me excited to go see the show. They did a terrific job!! Little ice princesses in the making.

My nephew is a hoot!! His dance is a jive and boogie (kindof like his Daddy) ! He really hears the beat and can move to it!

My Mom and Dad have been taking dance lessons and I got to see their moves....very cute!!! I would love to do this with my husband....exercise, romance and fun!

I love that God did put dancing in the Bible and He loves for us to dance unto Him. I think how fun it is for me to watch others dance for joy and I can see why He must love it.

So, off I go to dance another day and enjoy!

The Sister-hood

I have been visiting family and having a blast! I LOVE LOVE my Sista!
She and I Love to talk and laugh!

She is the one I can turn to when the mexican dinner is hitting my bladder and give a look to let her know a bathroom is needed pronto ain't no time to climb a ladder! She doesn't shudder or complain but only lets me do my thing.

She is the one who can turn music on and we sing together at the top of our lungs. We love to dance and act as on stage hoping that no one will see through the window blades. We still love using our old hand mikes and laughing at each other which isn't so nice.

I love to tease and get her goat because she gives me a look that can make me roll.

She is the one who can twitch her tiny nose and look like bewitching's samatha and poise.

Tonight we were visiting in the room and she asked me if that made me think of a girl we had known. I couldn't recall and she went out of the room only to come flying as if shooting bullets from boobs. I lost it with laughter and she calmly said "You don't recall?" All that she heard was very loud Ha Ha's.

She is all about details and loves her graph paper. She sometimes likes improv but would rather be safer.

She has always loved to read and books are a treat. I can't wait for her first written book I know I will be glued to my seat.

She is the person all friends want to know. She is loyal to the end and no punches will throw. She speaks truth in love and is empathetic and kind. She is like a ruby, a very rare find. I love her so deeply and feel that God knew, deep in that womb He must create two. I love that she enters life stages with me and that we challenge each other as we grow into maturity.

I love that she looks to God to be her guide and follows His word trying not to glide by. She loves her sweet husband and darling little children and strives to be a better servant. She leads other women by the life that she leads, allowing them to see her up moments and retreats.

She takes pride in her work and cares for her home. Living life's moments for the Lord on the throne.

I don't know how to express the joy that she brings it reminds me simply of hearing her sing.

I cannot believe how blessed I have been to have Such a Sister and Such a Dear Friend!!!!

Whooo HOO!!!

Two Weeks Off of any praise team practice or leading!!! CAN I get an AMEN! Whoo Hooo!!!

Oh yea
No team practice
Oh yea
No team leading
Uh huh
Goin Home now
Get to see
My Family

bum ba da dum ba da dum bom bom

I asked another praise team in the area if they would be willing to lead ours for a couple of weeks and they said YES!!

And that's not all!!! Are you sitting down?!! Prayers have been answered!! We got a good offer on our house!!!! IT looks like things are going through!!! WHOO HOOO!!! Can I get a shout of P-R-A-I-S-E!!!! Okay, I'm not T.D. Jakes....just a want ta be.

Well, I must be off to pack and get headed home!!! :) Hope you are having a great day! Oh yea, it looks like there may be some severe weather coming....I'm trying to beat it so I would covet your prayer support for travel!

Courageous Woman

I was reading a book I had bought a while back to take my daughter through. It is called Polished Cornerstones. Anyway, it addresses so many wonderful issues. I got to one chapter last night that baffled me. It was about a Courageous Woman. It was talking about the things that you should be asking yourself about yourself or your daughter to see if she was living a courageous life.

I guess I never expected to find many of my fears and worry to be about being courageous. I always thought I was. But, as I read these questions many of them convicted me greatly. I thought I would share some of the thoughts.

Is she afraid to trust God with her life?

Does she trust God to protect and provide for her?

Does she trust God to work all things (good and bad) together for her good? (that's a tough one)

Is she afraid she will be hurt or denied happiness if she submits to your authority?

Does she respond to her fears with prayer for God's strength and courage?

Does she recall God's word when she is fearful?

Is she afraid of peoples opinion of her?

Is she afraid to fail?

Is she afraid to try again when she fails?

Is she afraid to try anything new?

Is she afraid to stand up for what is right?

Is she afraid of the future?

Is she worrisome, continually visualizing potential dangers, failures, and problems?

Is she afraid of personal harm?

Is she afraid to say "no" when others ask her to accept responsibilities that will cause her to over-extend herself?

.....and on it went. Wow. For me this was really good to read. It had scripture and other books to read and work on in this area.

I really like this book because it gives great thoughts and ideas to do with your girls or yourself. They also have one for boys called "Plants Grown up" but I haven't read through it yet. If you haven't heard of this and would like to check it out I think the site is www.doorposts.net.

Shout Out

This weekend was a tough one. I got sad news from back home and some friends as well as an incident happening that made for a very tough weekend. I have had tears and sadness as well as busyness.

I must say though that last night I was flipping through some channels and came upon T.D. Jakes. I don't know if you have heard of him but he gives amazing word pictures. He was talking about Joshua and he was talking about how God wants us to praise Him even before a wall comes down. How he wants us to shout out His praise and trust Him.

T.D. was getting into it and asked if anyone wanted to shout out praise to God to which the people in T.V. land started shouting and so did I!! It was so great! I know you are thinking I am loosing it but really, how many times do we just let out a real shout to God?

Anyway, the people kept shouting and he let them. It was really neat to watch and listen because it made me think of that seventh day and what the people of Israel must have sounded like. It was powerful.

He was saying how God wanted Joshua to follow and seek His guidance daily. That for the first days God was saying to walk around the wall one time and come home. Then, at the end he said Joshua may have started to walk around one time again when the Lord would have guided Him that "No, you need to listen daily" and shared the the final plan of walking 7 times and shouting.

The walls come down.

Then, I just have to laugh thinking about it, T.D. said "Then, they became High steppers, stepping over the rubble and moving on. High steppers!" Just like we need to do when the walls that have blocked us finally come crumbling down. Step over that rubble and move on.

Tagged

My sweet friend tagged me with this fun little kitchen questionaire.

1. How many meals does most of your family eat at home each week? How many are in your family? Since I homeschool we eat a lot of meals at home. However, since we started soccer and have practices three nights a week at supper time and church or meetings the other nights as of late we have eaten out much more for supper. There are 4 in our family.

2. How many cookbooks do you own? around 22 My favorites are the "Fix it and forget it!", "Fix it and forget it Lightly" and "Fix it and forget it entertaining". They for the crockpot so it is nice to get it started early and it smells great at the end of the day...if you are there to eat it at the end of the day. :) I also love all the kid cookbooks...quick and more my level...Ha!

3. How often do you refer to a cookbook each week? Weekly.

4. Do you collect recipes from other sources? Yes, I love getting recipes from family and friends. I also check out the internet for some great recipes.

5. How do you store those recipes? In a plastic baggy(that holds my favorites) or recipe box. But mostly use my cookbooks.

6. When you cook, do you follow the recipe pretty closely, or do you use recipes primarily to give you ideas? It depends, as with my hair, I think that I am a gormet cook as well and I wing it. If I don't have some ingredients I improvise with what I think should go there.

7. Is there a particular ethnic style or flavor that predominates in your cooking? If so, what is it? Probably not, I like a mixture, Southern, Mexican, Italian.

8. What’s your favorite kitchen task related to meal planning and preparation? (eating the finished product does not count) Serving plates with the yummy meal prepared.

9. What’s your least favorite part? chopping....I'm not very patient.

10. Do you plan menus before you shop? Try to.

11. What are your three favorite kitchen tools or appliances? Pampered chef Vegetable steamer, only about $11.00 but it is amazing. Put raw or frozen veggies in, push microwave for 3 minutes and wa-la...tender steamed veggies to put in entree or just eat. Of course I love my microwave, fridge and dishwasher.

12. If you could buy one new thing for your kitchen, money was no object, and space not an issue, what would you most like to have? new dining room chairs...they are pretty and antique but wobbley.

13. Since money and space are probably objects, what are you most likely to buy next? Pampered chef stoneware casserole dish.

14. Do you have a separate freezer for storage? Yes- a small chest.

15. Grocery shop alone or with others? Hubby picks up on the way home. We do angel food and then get smaller things along the way. When I must go I probably prefer to go alone just for think time.

16. How many meatless main dish meals do you fix in a week? Probably 4-5. Grilled cheese, mac and cheese, pasta and veggies etc.

17. If you have a decorating theme in your kitchen, what is it? Favorite kitchen colors? I don't really have a theme. It is mostly white and that is fine for fresh feel. I would probably prefer a taupe or light yellow color. I had that in our last house and enjoyed it, with white molding.

18. What’s the first thing you ever learned to cook, and how old were you? Cinnamon toast or chocolate chip cookies....teenager. My Mom was WAY to sweet to us and did most of the cooking.

19. How did you learn to cook? I learned some from watching and helping my Mom. I probably learned the most just by trying once I was on my own and then married. My husband and I learned together. After that I just got more info. and learning from family and friends.

20. Tagging… I’m tagging Janiners and Warmhearts and any new friends on site that would like to try.

Gripping Fear

Last night I had one of those dreams that sets your heart racing. It was about my daughter, one of my greatest fears, and I walked in after it had happened. She was scared needing me and I was wanting to kill someone. I began pelting her with questions wanting to know all and find someone. She couldn't think clearly and just wanted comfort. I woke up very sick at my stomach and heart racing. I was so full of emotions. I ran to my Father seeking comfort, I wanted Him to tell me nothing like this would ever happen to my children, that they would never have any discomfort, that they would always be protected, that I would never have to face this fear or walk through this pain etc... I know he doesn't promise me no pain or hard times but I still want that.

He told me "Be still and know that I am God"

I felt calm again.

Psycho Soccer Parents

I was floored last night when I went to a soccer practice at all that transpired. My daughter who is 6 was on a team of 5-6 year olds and her coach decided they would play against another team for practice. The other team happened to be boys. Anyway, the girl on our team who is probably the best started crying in the very beginning. She had a sideline of parents, aunts, gramps cheering for her and instructing her and you could tell it was serious to all. If she didn't do something right she would get frustrated and start crying. After a while of this the coach looked at the parents and asked if she should take her out...parents said "No, she is fine." Then she and a boy on the other team slammed into each other and went down. I knew that had to really hurt. She hopped up crying hard and again her parents yelled to her to be tough and keep playing. At this point the usually passive coach took action and made her come out. I was really proud of her for at least doing the right thing in spite of it all. Then, a little boy on the other team kicked at the soccer ball and missed but landed on his tooshie very hard. Our star player was back in the game at that point and took advantage of his pain and kicked it in to which all her family cheered. The little boy was crying and the coach of the other team brought him out. I was feeling so sorry for him only to hear his loving response from his Dad say "Suck it up...suck it up" and give him no love and even began getting mad at him for not stopping the crying! He finally did suck it up and stop. Come on people....give me a total break!! I know we don't want our kids crying all the time over menial things but when they are hurt? We are talking 5-6 year olds suppose to be doing this for fun!! I mean, this wasn't even a game it was a p-r-a-c-t-i-c-e. Our star player also likes to shove in order to accomplish her goal and get the ball. At the last game almost all the parents on the other team began instructing their kids to shove her down and play how she played. It was really bad and I was shocked at what I was hearing. At this practice, I seriously thought about going over to that little boy and telling him I would be crying too and that wasn't a bad thing. But, his mom looked like she could probably take me out so I refrained.

I was thinking about the messages that was sending to those kids. To the boy....when hurt don't show any emotions...don't seek help....suck it up. To the daughter...I know your tired and sad but make that goal!! Do whatever it takes even if you have to shove people out of the way to get what you want...It is more important than you are!! Man, I know that I , as a parent, make many mistakes and make my kids hear wrong messages all the time but this is one instance I just don't see the point! Just had to share my psycho soccer parents moment.

Shhhhh

I saw a video clip that really touched me...well several from this site www.sermonvideos.com. I want to share the words to one.

Shhhhh.....

Stop thinking
planning
worrying

about your marriage
taxes
cars
the news
your job
money
relationships
sports
the stock market
what's on tv
your future
your past
your kids
your education
your weekend
your wardrobe

about where you will eat

after this

None of that compares to what I have to tell you

but you have to listen

Be silent

Be Calm

Be Still

and know

that I am God.

Romantic clothing

I have been searching for some time for romantic clothing. I love the look of the edwardian time and victorian age when people look so flowy and beautiful. I want that now. I am really tired of going to a store and being forced to see rolls of skin fall out, shirts that are skin tight and not pretty in the least, low rise jeans that look more like a plummer with the crack showing than women. Around here it seems the tighter the shirt and the more the rolls the better. ugh. Then I have to look at my own clothing. It's not that I mean to get it to tight but at times when I stand it looks pretty good but when I sit...HELLO...there we go. I mean, don't you ever just want to walk the field in a prairie skirt or go waltzing with the victorian gowns, or go for a stroll like Lizzy in Pride and Prejudice with the empire waist gown? I would love to make the classy, ladylike, romantic clothing of old, marry with a more modern look. Some days I long for the prairie days of baking bread and flowing the fields in my skirt (okay, I would like to keep my air conditioning and dishwasher and I know they did MUCH more than bake bread ) and just feeling well....feminine.

I don't want jumpers that are frumpy, I don't want dresses that make me look like a triangle, I just want dresses that would fit and look flowing and beautiful and casual and light. Is that to much to ask? I told my sister that I think this would be a great business venture for me. Right after I finish learning how to sew.

March Already?!!

I couldn't believe it when I realized we had just passed through yet another month! Yikes!! Today my son was talking about how in just a few years he would be thirteen and sister eleven. I felt a great panic come over me!! Not my babies!! I have been around a friend with youth, one daughter about to graduate and go to college and I am watching her go through elation for her daughter and sadness for herself. She has another son that will be a senior next year and another daughter that will just be beginning high school next year....whoa!

Anyway, it has definitely taken me from calm to fear to calm to fear to prayer. I love my kids SO much and it hurts to even think about them all grown up. I am so sentimental. However, I am also excited for their futures and what God will do through their lives. I am excited about when I will get to spoil their kids and maybe be a grandmother. There are still many things I look forward too. I'm hoping that I will grieve it along the way and be okay when it really happens. Well, I can hope can't I!?

I think another thing that got this thought going was we had a prospective worship leader in last weekend. We spent most of our time with them (he and his wife). They are SO young...just little pups! It really made me feel old. I think I like to still think of myself as young but I am truly in the middle age now! Anyway, he seems to have a real heart for worship and I think he will do good but he will also have a lot to learn. We are all in prayer over this. I'm sure we all have pros and cons so it is just really finding out what God wants for our church. I have to admit I am probably more anxious to get it done than most so it is tempting to just say yes so someone else will be doing it. However, I know the consequences if it is not a good fit...tough, for them and us. So I want to be as sure as we can that it is a right fit.

I have to say though, I have been enjoying worship leading a little more now that I am getting a little more of an idea what to do. There is still a lot of learning going on but it is not as overwhelming as it was at first. I actually had quite a lot of older adults coming up to me after last weeks second service saying they really felt the Lord's presence that day and enjoyed the songs. I was glad for that. I had felt Him too and I'm so thankful for His grace and mercy to me. Thanks for your continued prayer support for me!

Well, I guess that is all I have to time to write at present. March on!

Can You Do That?

I was watching my daughter in pretend mode when she didn't know it (so don't talk to her about this instance or she'll know I was). Anyway, she was doing a trick and turning sideways as if asking a friend.
"Can you do that?"
Then being the friend she tried it.
She did this back and forth many times until finally the so called friend couldn't do it. To that she replied, "See, only I can do it. " Big smile.

My son meanwhile is making very interesting noises as he is playing in the imagination with his blanket wrapped around the neck and fighting movements.

Oh, to be young and in pretend world again.

Contrast

First of all, I want to start out by thanking those of you who have been praying for me since an earlier blog about my struggle with overeating. I am happy to relate that although results are not as fast as I would like to see them God does daily encourage me and show me results. He also has shown that the main thing is my heart obedience rather than results. This is where I always struggled in the past, giving up when results didn't come as fast as I wanted. However, now I see that it will come in time....His time. My sister has to listen to my moment by moment realizations such as profile not sticking out quite as much, dent in's in various places that before were full (although maybe not apparant to anyone but me), to a finale....my face appearing thinner!! My face has always been round and when I am overall fuller it is REALLY Round!! I looked just the other day to find I had dent in's in my face...what?! rub eyes....it's true. So, this brings you up to date and back to my original story.

Since I notice this difference I run to a family picture we had taken in the fall. I look, I compare, feeling happy. I go to my husband and ask (which he loves), "Honey, do you notice anything different about this picture of me and my present face?" He looks, the kids overhear and come bounding in. Here are the responses "Your hair is curled, Your hair is white AND black, You have on jewelry, you look more tan in the picture, you are wearing earrings in the picture" I give up then my son loudly says "Your face is thinner." I hear the Hallelujah chorus playing in the back of my head but I'm still reserved. I ask "You mean my face is thinner in the picture or right now?" He says "thinner now, is that okay?" Inside my head I'm screaming....Is that okay!!! Whooo hoo! But outwardly I say, "oh yea, that's okay, that's what I had noticed too." He goes on to add one more, "Your neck has more lines in it now than in the picture too." (lovely) Oh well, if having a more thin neck means a more wrinkly neck then Bring it On!!

Please continue to lift me up in this, it is war, the enemy is always giving me lies and I am constantly having to talk with the Lord and seek HIS truth which is setting me free! Please don't get me wrong, I am no where near where I want to be but I do see once again that God is faithful giving me little by little step by step and I feel it would be wrong of me not to sing His praise or give testimony to this. My sister found another site that deals with the same godly principles but it doesn't have the works mentality but grace. It is www.thinwithin.org.

Dances With Wolves

I don't know how many remember a movie by that name but it had to do with indians and they had names that describe them. Anyway, tonight when my daughter declared her name (as she was delivered to me in the mail, in a box) as "Cuddles with Momma" I couldn't help but think of it. Son decided that he would be the dog and took the name Rover. Anyway, I, of course, was the Mommy...it was really a challenging role for me. They really were quite hysterical, son stretching and turning head sideways and trying to get on blankets that were not his, all reflecting our dog. He also did not talk or smile being that dogs don't. "Cuddles with momma" soon changed her name to "cute and cuddly". Anyway, it was a fun pretend time with Mommy having much laughter. Son had also made a movie earlier and without realizing he was filming I asked him a question in the middle of it while he was being the mean scary covered man and he answered "Yes ma'am". We all got pretty tickled when watching it and I felt bad that I had blown his bad boy cover. Well, off I go, I'm thinking what I would like my new name to be "Washes with soap", "folder of laundry", "fixer of food", "player with children", "embracer of humiliation", "hearty loud laugher" (okay, I know you are probably hoping I will stop)......

What to be when I grow up

We were around the table and my son asked me what I thought he would be when he grew up. I told him I thought he could do many things but it would really be up to him. He asked what things I thought. So, I began listing a long list, science lab man, inventor, teacher, pastor (nose wrinkled, hmm note to self), missionary (eyes lit up and he said, Yea! That would be fun to travel the world!, Mommy whinsed, son noticed...What Mom? Oh, nothing sweetie, I want you to do whatever God leads you to do, it's just that I will miss you. He says "Oh, you'll be fine." that's his fathers blood.) So on and on we went until finally I said "You know, you have such a wonderful voice I could even see you leading worship" "No, I wouldn't want to do that, it takes away from family" me frowning. "Honey, are you saying that because of what Mommy's doing?" He hesistates realizing Mommy could get feelings hurt. "Well, kindof"...."ouch". I'm feeling bad that he feels I'm putting it in place of family time. I pour my story out to hubby who gives me the look. You know the "You've got to be kidding me look" saying, "That's just because he thinks family time is all day access to Mom's attention." Hey! Whewl sure. He needs me! ;) Anyway, at the end of this wonderful in depth look at the future and deep thought of all he might want to aspire to my son spouts "Really I think I still want to be a cashier at wal-mart."

My son saying

My son came in to me today and said "Mom, you know that song that says there is nothing my God cannot do? Well, that is not entirely true. When you are a Christian, God can never leave you, annnddd He can not be mean. "

"Mom, do you know how many times our heart beats in a year?"
Me "No"
"Do you give up?"
Me "yes, do you know the answer?"
"yes, 40 million times. Isn't that cool?"
"That is cool honey."

My son has always been a learner who asks questions and seeks answers. When he was two it was Very apparent but then I realized it is his way of learning and now I love watching his questions turn into a learning moment. Learning either for him or me. :)

Sister coming to Christ

A few years ago when my son was around 5 and sister 3 he had a talk with her. He had been asking everyone he knew if they were a Christian. It was so important to him that everyone know! He was so excited about his own decision. Anyway, one day he came running in from outside and excitedly shouted, "Mom, (sister) became a Christian!!" I knew he was good at persuading her to do lots of things so I began to talk to her. I didn't feel she fully got it but I wasn't going to discount their excitement or childish belief.

A few weeks ago they were talking in the car about being a christian and my son mentioned how they were both christians. I talked about how he had shared with her before but I didn't know if she fully understood since they had been so young. She said she did understand and she had made that decision. Brother told me that he was not talking about that time but another time more lately. I asked about it and they said it was back in the summer when they talked about it and she made a decision to become a christian. I was floored. We talked about it more and I asked more about when, how etc. I was amazed that something this great took place just between them. It was really sweet. I'm sure we will talk more about this decision but I am so excited for her already starting this journey. Her brother got baptized last summer, and come to think of it, that may have been when this whole conversation could have come up. Well, I look forward to watching them embark on this walk of faith!

Cold Soccer Games

My kids both got signed up for soccer and this past Saturday was their first soccer games. It turns out that it was the coldest day since we have been here!! We usually have really nice weather but Sat. it was 40 and the wind was blowing fiercely. We had chairs, blankets, umbrella's to stop the wind, heavy coats etc. However, they both had fun and enjoyed it. We were never so ready to jump in that car and head home.

Open House

Last night we went to the Christian school (at our church) open house. We wanted to be present to meet families, teachers, see classrooms and let them know we appreciate them. Anyway, as you can imagine everyone begins to think that we were there checking it out for our children. I was asked and even pressured to put our kids into the school. It was so funny because even some Moms (who thought they knew) asked my kids directly if they would like to come to the school. My kids shook their heads no. Good call. :) It was harder than I expected. I guess I thought people would know we were just there to support but guess not. I know that each parent has to make their own decisions on these things and I wish that they would not try to make it for me. However, I also know that when you are passionate about something you do want others to try it! Anyway, as I looked at the classrooms these were some of my thoughts:

They had some Precious decorated reading areas with a little bench but I like being in our living room on our big comfy couch for reading time.

They had cute little desks for the kids to sit in, but I like it when we are circled around the table learning together.

They had great play ground equipment for recess, but I like doing nature studies, playing soccer and reading in our own back yard.

The had a big industrialized kitchen and long tables that looked really clean for lunch, I like talking with my kids while eating lunch and also cooking and cleaning together in the kitchen as well as picnics outside.

They had loving teachers who gave hugs and warm words, I love being the teacher and getting those hugs and cuddles and kisses as well as giving warm words.

They have wonderful kids to play and interact with, I love getting together with other families who share similar values and thoughts and letting the kids play and bond together.

They have wonderful kids and sweet teachers to influence them. I like hubby and I being the main influence on them and helping them learn and search for themselves.

They have good Bible stories, I like our Bible study time and watching my kids draw pictures from it and share what they learned also hearing and answering their many questions.

They have an energetic coach and p.e. classes, we enjoy participating in extra activities like soccer and getting to be with them when they practice and play to cheer them on.


I know there will come a day when my kids will grow up and leave and hopefully they will have grasped how to make decisions and follow after God's leadership. However, today is not that day. My time with them is so brief and I want to enjoy every moment God has given me with these precious treasures.

Little Happenins

Tonight I was rushing through Wal-mart for a few items with my kids in toe. As I walked I was getting lots of looks (due to the loud hair color). Finally this one little girl turned her head to follow me and said loudy "Oh My G--, did you see her hair?!!" I walked on proud, shoulders back, head held high embracing humiliation once again.

I made a phone call today for a hair place to restore a better look. It was a place I have driven by many times. I decided to take the right pre-cautions and asked how long the lady had been in service, over 10 years? sounds good.
Can I make an appointment?
Yes, when would you like to come?
Do you have any available slots tomorrow?
Yes, what time do you want?
(Huh? They have that many open slots...first red flag)
Uhhh, mid- morning.
What time?
Uhh, 10?
Okay. Bye.
bye.
(second red flag, they didn't take my name or number.)
I call back
Hello?
Hello, I just made an appointment for tomorrow 10am but they didn't get my name don't you need my name?
No, you can just come.
Oh, okay.
click
(thinking I need to find a new stylist.)


Due to gall bladder complications I am pretty good at belching contests. My son informed me that he had read in his "The way things were" book that in olden times it was considered good manners when one burped after a meal, indicating they were full and it was delicious. I think we need to reinstate that as a good manner.

Ahhhh

Today I was treated to some major relaxation!! I got to have a massage. It was heavenly!! Almost as good as chocolate. :) Seriously, there were sore muscles I didn't even know were there and they were worked out and I was like putty at the end. The lady who was there was really sweet and had an amazing testimony. Her whole place just reeked of relaxation. I think I am starting to feel sleepy. Anyway, a big shout out to honey for the wonderful valentine gift!

Wreckless Abandon

I have learned in my weeks and months here in the valley that humiliation is not as bad as one might think. I mean, what is the point of always having it together...no one could relate. Humiliation on the other hand...everyone can relate.

I know you are probably worried that I embarrassed myself again with the worship but thankfully this week went rather smooth. I did have a little girl around age of 11 sing a special. She has a Beautiful angelic voice. She did a great job except for the end where in both services she lost her place. In the first service she found it again but in the second she just stopped. I just got up and she went to sit down and covered her head and cried. I was quick to talk to her afterwards to let her know that mess ups have happened to me many times using last week as a prime example. It seemed to cheer her up. But as for me, thankfully it went pretty smooth even without the former guitarist. In fact, our practice actually went more smooth and quick...hmmm. God may have some blessings in disguise.

Anyway, back to wreckless abandon, my hubby had a birthday and we celebrated early on Friday. On Sat. he got to do what he wanted which was kick back and relax. That evening we had a valentines banquet. I noticed the roots of my hair really looking bad and once again (I know you are all groaning) took matters into my own hands. Well, it wasn't so brassy this time...just platinum. I had to laugh. I had also decided I would fix it different...it is getting a little longer. I curled it and it curled up. My son said "Mom, why did you make your hair white, and the way you fixed it looks like those old timey women." Thanks honey. When I walked in to ask my husband if it was really that bad he gave me the shocked look and said, "Is that how you wanted it?" Nice confirmation that it was shocking. Now I don't want to go to the banquet but it is to close to time, I have to face humiliation once again.

At the banquet some of the younger men, (who haven't learned that keeping your mouth shut about a woman's hair is a good thing) asked me what I did or if I had whitened it or something. However, I got a much more positive response from the women...which suprised me. They all seemed to love it. So, I have decided to forget worrying about humiliation. I am embracing it!! Maybe it is because I am getting older and care less about what people think. Well, off I go to brown my skin and look even more like a woman in mid life crisis.

Happy Birthday ValiantDad!!!

Today is my precious Hubby's birthday!!! He will never let me forget that I am 1 year and 3 months older than him. :) Nice. I tease but his sense of humor has always been something I Love! He makes me laugh all the time and even when it might sometimes be in appropriate. He can say something histerical and then keep a solemn face so I look like the childish one laughing while he is calm. His blogger name fits him perfect. He is valiant indeed. He is brave enough to make the hard decisions and soft enough to have compassion with us. When I first met him his mannerisms and character truly made me think of the gentlemen in the victorian age. He is a leader to the core. Yet, he is loving and caring as well. He leads by his own actions and example. He searches how to follow the Lord and lead his family. He is a man of GREAT Faith, not a worrier. He is the rock that his name represents. He is willing to review his actions and be man enough to know when to apologize and make things right. He is a terrific Dad! He has always chosen to be a part of our kids lives and loves them so much. When we were first married he made the decision to put family first even throughout ministry. This is hard to do because there are always needs but he knows when to draw that line. The kids know he loves them and they adore him! He is a wonderful husband, friend, confidant, love, and leader to me! We have always teased because whatever personality test he takes it is usually in a low percentage because it is always a unique mix. However, I am honored to have one of the few of his personality. He is my gift from God, my true treasure and I cherish him daily and especially today, the day God first brought him into the world to bless so many! I love you honey! Happy Birthday!!

Broken Dreams

Last night I was with a friend that is a mother. Without revealing what happened, her daughter made a bad choice. A choice that broke dreams the mother had for her. I was with her when she found out and watched the heart wrenching brokeness and tears. I heard her talk of her love for her daughter and how she felt betrayed. The why's, how, grief. I was broken with her and cried with her, prayed with her, encouraged her, so much pain. She is someone I admire for having such a good relationship with her kids and leading them to the Lord and yet, bad choice that devastated was still made. Hard. It obviously made me think of how I would feel or respond if Iwere in that situation in the future. Then, God allowed me to see Him. His brokeness when we continually choose the wrong choices. Choices that influence our lives and cause consequences that hurt. Hurt not only us but those who love us. It has been very convicting today and sobering. I truly break His heart with decisions like that, choosing the wrong choice. I have a new perspective today. I don't think I will ever forget the heart wrenching feeling from last night.

Funny Foul-ups

This past Sunday I got there early ready to practice with the praise team. All but one were late. Needless to say we did not get through our whole set. However, Wed. nights practice had gone well so I anticipated a lovely day. The organist had shown up and we thought he could help us out on a couple of songs that would add fullness. So began the first service. The first song was upbeat and went okay. Next some slower sets with the organ. I heard notes coming out and tried to sing with them but it was fumble, bumble, fumble, stop, fumble bumble stop as I tried to keep singing. I frantically looked to the other instrumentalist to help me but they were looking at me like deers in headlights...something was awry. We later found out he had a different key than we had had. Then it was time for a slow song that I had earlier told the organist Not to play on. I spoke and he began. I was sitting at the keyboard looking at my team wondering what to do. My friend in the pew was already rolling with laughter because she said my face was priceless it was a smile with a look of "what do I do". I did sit there waiting for him to stop. His wife at another instrument was giving the slash throat sign to get him to stop. She tried telling the male vocalist to stop him but the male vocalist can't sight read and promply made the facial expression..."Huh?" Finally the organist stopped. We started our worship medley but it was difficult to recover.

Break for Sunday School. My keyboardist reveals to me she cannot keep doing both services and teach S.S. Hmmm. The guitarist who leads most songs tells me that his last day is probably going to be Feb. 12 like he had told so and so. I am in shock. Okay Lord. The guitarist is not angry he is really relieved to be able to bow out because he has been wanting out for a while before we came. Oh boy. What to do. I go to my husbands office and lay my head on his desk. I look up at him and we both laugh. (remembering the disaster of 1st service). I tell him my latest news. He is suprised but tells me to let it go. Let them be free to go. He is right. God is in control. Who knows what I will do but that is for later panicking.

Before the next service I make some copies of our first song. It is "All things are Possible". After welcome we would be doing "All Creatures of our God and King". I then head back to get ready. I visit and come to the front to get started. The music to the first song begins. I am counting and watching what instrumentalist are doing. I am trying be sure I come in right. I do..hurray. I begin singing the melody BUT with the words to All creatures of our God and king. The people are giving me weird looks, I am thinking something is wrong with the words, it doesn't seem like it is fitting the next phrase. Hmmm....what's that....THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT WORDS FOR THIS SONG!!!! I HAVE to stop. I say "Oh. That's not the right words." The people all completely crack up. I am laughing hard myself. I go over toward the keyboardist to get the right music and she thinks I am coming to her so she stands and hugs me. People laugh harder. I come back and say "Well, aren't we glad God is a God of second chances!" Laugh again. Okay, now we can start the song with right words. Whew. What a day. We already have lunch plans with some families. I really just want to go home and cover my head under the blankets and take a well deserved nap. Oh well, off to face my humiliation and look forward to next week.

Bursting!

I cannot help it, I am bursting at the seams to shout God's praise! I have shared with you that He has put me in places which have pushed my comfort zone completely. One of them being the worship leading. Let me just say...I am SOOO inadequate and unworthy. Only He doesn't see it that way (of course not, I'm His child) because He knows what He can do. He has blessed me through this process beyond belief. The other day I was having time with Him and He laid a song on my heart in my worship of Him. It was simple but I was in worshipping heaven. The thought dawned on me, this would go perfect as a chorus with "I have decided to follow Jesus". I took it to the praise team and we practiced it with that hymn. Singing hymn verses 1,2 first, chorus He gave me twice, and then verse 2 again accapella. It was so focused on Him. Our praise time was so light and God helped me get ahead in planning so it is not so overwhelming. It was a lovely praising time!

THEN, in another area. Okay, this is WAY vulnerable. BUT! I feel that if we are to really give testimony to what He has accomplished in our lives then we MUST show the struggle so He can have the Glory when we overcome. Overeating. There. I said it. Okay, this has been a struggle of mine for years. It is hard for me to say it because I hate being accountable but I need to be accountable. Anyway, as sad as this is to say, about 8 years ago I heard about a lady named Gwen Shamblin...I read her books and they were Huge for the way I saw things and overeating. She had scripture on almost every page and put things in a way I really understood. Anyway, she is basically talking about ...well, I think I'll let you read it. I just can't explain it like she does. But the jest is to let God fill the emotional needs instead of food and let your stomach tell you when you are really hungry and when you are not. Anyway, God has been working on me on this lately again and it is as if some new understanding just clicked for me. I am definitely not fail proof but I tell you He is amazing. Here are some fun stories...jewels.

I was feeling a little hungry this one afternoon and I really wanted this special sugar cookie with icing. I asked God if what I was feeling was real hunger but felt that He wanted me to wait for Real hunger. I got into some other things with kids and went on. Later that evening real hunger came and ate portion controlled meal and headed out for practice. I was not completely full and had planned to take the cookie with me. Forgot it and felt disappointment. Went on to practice. I am making copies in the office and a lady walks up to the kids and me and said "Would you like a cookie?" I looked up....would you believe there standing before me was the VERY kind of cookie I had wanted!!! Down to the very same pink icing!! Wasn't that Sweet! He asked for my obedience but then gave me blessing for waiting.

Then! Our family was being taken out to lunch by some friends from Arkansas and I was at complete hunger so the small portions tasted so good. I stopped when pleasantly filled and just visited. As I sat there a thin eater (as we like to call them) comes in right in my watching range. I am curious and noisey so I watched sporatically. She did just as Gwen talks about. She ate little by little but enjoyed conversation. She probably only ate about 1/4 of her meal and boxed up the rest. It was again confimation that I was heading the right direction.

Then, the song story above.

Also, our realtor told us our showings on our house have picked up dramatically and some second lookers!! (Please keep in prayer on this)

Plus, my husband sending me a love song as well as giving me a marriage conference. Can it get any better!!!

Okay, I am not saying that God only blesses when we obey but I am saying that He loves to bless His children when they make the right choices. Just like we should be showing our children. With wrong choices...like mine to overeat...I have had weight issues, clothes don't fit right, not confident in appearance, daughter pushing big tummy, gall bladder attacks CONSEQUENCES. With choosing to obey...feeling in right relationship with Him, feeling more confident, happy, joyful, not having gall attacks, BLESSINGS!!

Again, He is a merciful God and has blessed me far beyond what I deserve even when I have failed because even when I am faithless He is faithful. However, when I choose Him how loved He must feel and how loved I feel. So I MUST shout His praise! He is Above all I ask or imagine!! He is Good!!!!

Love Song

My Dearest husband just made my week!! He sent me a love song via the internet with love from him!! How sweet is that!!! We are also getting to go to marriage conference this weekend which ends in a date night while kids have fun at the church!! I am SO excited! We haven't had an alone date night since we moved! WHOO HOO!! I have always loved going to marriage conferences. Some people think they are just for folks with problems (by the way, what marriage doesn't have some problems) but I think it is so great for the continued health of a marriage. I love getting away and simply focusing on us and our dynamics! It always gives us new things to work on and better ways to keep our marriage be healthy! I sure do love my husband and I feel so blessed that God has given me the treasure of him.